Ada waktu, we will felt like 'we good for nothing'.
Talk to my husband, that I'm so sorry.
He. who actually feed me, give me place to stay, medicate me when I'm in need, give me time to speak, give me plenty of jokes when I couldn't help to just smile and laugh out loud, sediakan pakaian yang lengkap, money provider, no scratch found since the day one I've becoming his wife.
I do understand my body is not possible to work more than I can, macam sebelum ni.
I felt sorry for myself for not having the energy that I should have on the age of 30s. But I felt sorry for my baby too, since my baby have to listen to all the arguments that I made to just make me feel good, emosi yang berkecamuk, the hardest crying part, anxiety short breath, I even listen to rock musics to put myself out of my own world (Astaghfirullahhalazim).
The nurses that taking care of me, always remind me to be just happy. 'its a process, let's just make a good progress'
How can I not adore these people, you tell me.
Sejak nak jadi seorang ibu, emosi aku makin melampau ya. I even marah to my husband on the smallest thing like, jatuh barang pun boleh membebel yg melampau.
And I know, he is sad. How I saw he tried everything just to soothe his mood and his heart. masyaAllah. May Allah grant you the very best blessed dear husband.
I've tried my best to just smile, everyday. I even cry when he is not around, so he worry nothing. Tapi selalunya kecundang.
Am I helpless? Or even useless?
I trust Allah's way. Semoga berkah yang dilimpahkan ini, berterusan bersama nikmat dan redha Allah.
#6monthstogo